Chi vuol essere milionario (2)

NATIONAL POSTCODE INTERNATIONAL LOTTERY AND PROMOTIONS.
VANM EEGENSTRAAT 70,
POST CODE 1122GK,
AMSTERDAM,THE NETHERLANDS.

FROM: THE DESK OF THE MANAGING DIRECTOR,
INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION/PRIZE,AWARD DEPT.
SCFN: [editato: adesso arriverà Macchianera.net a vedere cosa cè sotto? ;-)]
BATCH: [editato]

Attn:

We wish to congratulate you over your success in our computer balloting sweepstake held on the 4th day of November,2005.

This is a millennium scientific computer game in which email addresses were used. It is a promotional program aimed at encouraging internet users;therefore you do not need to buy ticket to enter for it.  [che culo!]

However,your email address was attached to Ticket No:[editato] ; with SerialNo: [editato] and LuckY No:[editato], which eventually won the lottery in the first category of the draws [che doppio culo! E sì che io di solito non nvinconemmeno al solitario del computer!]. Thisentitled to a cash prize of SEVEN HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND EUROS(€750,000.00) in cash credited to security file number [editato].This is from a total cash prize of (EUR 3.Million)share among four individuals in this category. [ottimo: allora posso smettere di cercare lavoro! Perché devo dividere 3 milioni con altri 3 sfigati? Non basto io?!]

We hope with a part of your winning ,you will take part in our NEXT year stake of Twenty million Euros(€20,000000.00)International Lottery Program. [ma ceeeeeerto! Piccola domanda: ma se già questanno ho vinto senza farre assolutamente niente, perché lanno prossimo devo prendere parte attivamente?]

Note that this program was largely promoted and sponsored by a group of philanthropist, industrialists and some other big multinational firms who wish to be anonymous. [Ah bene. Naturale che gli sponsor, filantropi o industriali che siano, ci tengono a rimanere nascosti e a non essere nominati, vero?]

Your funds is now deposited with our Payment/Finance Department in the security company to your name [a mio nome? E quando ve lavrei comunicato, visto che lemail che avete usato è assolutamente anonima?], Due to the mixed up of some numbers and names [e te pareva! Hanno affidato lestrazione ad italiani?], we ask that you keep this winning a top secret from the public notice [sì sì, sarà il nostro piccolo segreto] until your claims has been processed and remitted to your account [ma mi vanno benissimo i contanti] as this is a part of the security protocol, to avoid double claiming or unwarranted taking advantage of this program by participants [double claiming? Ma non è un sistema computerizzato? Cosa avete usato? Un pallottoliere rotto?].

TO begin your claims, please contact your claim agent:

NATIONAL POSTCODE LOTERIJ AGENCY:

DR.Smith Morgan(Director of Foreign Transfer) [Smith? Ma che nome originale!]
TEL: 0031-628-396-069
Fax: 0031-847-304-633
Email:postcodeagents01@netscape.net
[cazzo! La National Postcode Loterij Agency – perché mezzo in nederlandese e mezzo in inglese? – non ha nemmeno un indirizzo di posta specifico ma usa netscape.net? Che lotteria  miserrima!]

For processing and remittance of your cash to a designated account of your choice [ripeto: facciamo pure in contanti]. Remember,all winnings must be claim not later than 18th day of November,2005 [beh, me la prendo comoda, alllora].After this date, all unclaimed funds will be returned to The Netherlands Gaming Board  [quanta fretta, ma dove corri, dove vai?].

Furthermore, should there be any change of email address, do inform your claim agent as soon as possible.

Congratulations once again from all members of our staff and thank you for being part of our promotions [ma è un piacere! Quando mi date i soldi?].

Yours sincerely,
Mrs. Doris Phillips(Lottery Coordinator)
[Dirs Philips? Ma un nome che sia almeno lontanamente nederlandese, no, eh?]

—————————
Chiedo scusa per aver editato così tanto ma so che voi, gelosi ed invidiosi, non aspettate altro che i dati della mia vincita per andare a ritirare i miei 750 mila euro! Invece me li becco tutti io!!! HAR HAR HAR (risata satanica)

Vedi qui

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  1. #1 by quisquose on 6 November 2005 - 18:58

    Egoista! ;-)

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